What a difference a year makes

I realized today that one year ago at this time I was just being removed from the operating room from my second bariatric surgery. Third if you count the one where they had to do the reversal and fix what broke.

It seems so long ago and yet it seems just like yesterday. I remember vividly the struggles I faced right after surgery and how scared I was that something g was going to go wrong.

But since then I've lost another 42 lbs. I originally started in a size 24. I got down to a 14 and after the complication got back up to a 16. Now I'm in a size 10. It's really hard to comprehend sometimes how far I've come. I'm not just talking physically, but mentally. Trust me when I say mentally I still have a long way to go. But I've also come a long way as well. 

I decided to do my third half marathon this year. I think it might be my final. Not my final race but my final of that distance. I still feel like I have something to prove, although if you ask me what that something is, I wouldn't be able to tell you. 

I sometimes still don't feel like I know who I am. Although, I am more "me" than I've ever been before. When I was heavy, I was just Nicole, the cranky, sarcastic, fat girl. Now I'm Nicky, the cranky (way less so), sarcastic (still just as much), social activist, coach, inspirational speaker, social media maven, and all around likable gal. 

Maybe I was those things before and I just couldn't see them? Either way, I'm still enjoying learning who the new Nicole/Nicky is.