Speaking words of wisdom, let it be

Wow, two posts in one day.

I couldn't go by without putting this down though because something very special happened to me tonight. 

It's odd how things happen, don't you think? 

I had no intention if doing yoga tonight however the treadmills were all full at the gym and I was right on time to pop into class. My lower back had been hurting and I thought it could only help.

I'm usually not very focused during practice. I can't get out of my own head and I'm too focused on balance but for some reason none of that mattered tonight. 

I was able to let everything go and just breathe into the poses. It was almost the end and I was in tree pose. I know how bizarre what I'm about to say is going to sound, trust me. 

All of a sudden, in the mirror the figure I was looking at changed. The "fat girl" wasn't there anymore. I saw ME. I saw me how others see me. I saw a healthy, thin, beautiful woman. That honestly is the first time the fat girl wasn't there staring back at me. 

I don't know if this will last or what even happened tonight but as tears stream down my face I am thankful for the view that I saw tonight. 

To child or not to child

As we had a baby shower today for one of my employees, the never ending question arose about when I was going to "join the club", when I was going to "pop one out", and "was I next?"

After politely smiling time after time, again and again, explaining that Nils and I don't want children right now and then getting the "but, why", I've almost resigned myself to these conversations.

With a deep sigh I no longer feel indignant and annoyed when I get asked these questions because what's the point? The conversations happen all the time.
There are few people that I will actually have the full on conversation about why with...that includes my two very best friends, my mother, and my very favorite cousin Tami. Other than that...I don't want to discuss it with you. 

And then, as if by miracle, this article appeared on facebook today posted by a friend.

I don't have anything to add to it.
It's basically perfectly written. And I'll leave it at that.

READ ME

Servant Leadership

I've been doing a lot of questioning of myself lately. Today that came to an end.

Today I was shown what a difference I make in the lives of my employees both personally and professionally.

Today my Director played this video in addition and I know where I belong

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YVMBJ9kvl2g

Something Wicked

I just watched the latest Dateline called "Something Wicked."

In a small town, in a high school, there were three girls. Two girls befriended a third and went through an entire process of becoming inseperable with the intent of murdering her. 

I thought that nothing could shock me any longer, but the murder of Skylar Neece did. The police officer said "evil comes in all sizes and shapes." The parents, the other girl's friends...none of them saw this coming. These two girls were such amazing actresses that after Skylar went missing, Skylar's parents begged the police to leave the two girls alone because they were "like daughters" and couldn't possibly have anything to do with this. 

To think, that my nieces are going to school and later in life might have to deal with people like this is sickening to me. These 16 year old girls had their parents, their school mates, and a "best friend" they spent 24 hours a day with fooled beyond belief. The whole time intending to murder her to see what it was like. You may say to me, there had to be signs. There's nothing to worry about because people like that will be found out. An entire town and high school full of kids and teachers didn't find them out. 

Some people say you can't live your life in fear and the joy of having a child of your own outweighs the small chance that this could happen. 

I say...does it really?