Chances are you know what one of those words mean.
“Friendship is the hardest thing in the world to explain. It's not
something you learn in school. But if you haven't learned the meaning of
friendship, you really haven't learned anything.” -Mohammed Ali
"Friendship is always a sweet responsibility, never an opportunity." -Unknown
I guess I like to think I surround myself with people who view friendship in the same manner as I do. When I was a kid, my mom used to tell me, "One day, you'll end up like me, with a handful of close friends, and it's going to be the quality that matters, not the quantity."
(She's a smart lady.)
I always thought to myself, "But, Ma, ALL my large quantity of friends are quality anyways!"
Over the years, I learned that wasn't the case. I wasn't always a quality friend when I was young, but as I hit college, I learned what being a quality friend meant. And, over the years, I learned that not everyone understood what being a friend meant. As with everything I suppose, everyone has a different view on what being a friend means. I've had a constant in my life for about eight years now that I can say truly gets me and I truly get her and I'm thankful for that.
Forging deep connections requires a certain amount of emotional
investment, authenticity and risk. Maintaining them demands energy and
may occasionally push our boundaries. Most real friendships eventually
take some work, and they almost never come with guarantees. This is something I've had to learn. When I really give of myself to a friendship...I give a guarantee, but what I'm learning is that it isn't always reciprocated. That hurts. When you think about it, it feels like other people are being chosen over you. It makes you think about your guarantee...and when it's time to revoke it...because at what point do you continue to reach out, to not have your friendship reciprocated?
On the other side of that coin, I've been SO very lucky in the past few months to take a friendship that I've had that was created when I started walking/running and really grow and water it. We've connected with things in our life, even rooting to our families, that my heart feels so connected to her and to say I'm thankful isn't enough. I feel like I can share anything with her--doubts and fears, both personally and professionally, and she has been my shelter from the storm. And I hope I've been the same for her. She is extraordinarily important in my life. She's my "sister" (*wink, wink*) and she knows who she is.
If you read classic literature on friendship, you'll see that to people such as
Aristotle, Montaigne, Shakespeare, Hemmingway, and much later, C. S.
Lewis, true friendship was much more than the companionship often
mistaken for it. The friendship we find in their writings will probably
not be found in the club, sharing a girls night out with acquaintances, or lamenting at happy hour. Montaigne even expressed you might
find one true friendship in every 300 years. I don't necessarily believe that to be true...I mean Laverne & Shirley, Lucy & Ethel, The cast of Friends, The Pretty Little Liars...we've got some winners there.
I guess that was a long winded and blabbering way to say be kind to one another. Cherish your friendships. Friends are the people who help celebrate your success, provide support through the tough times, and through the consistent times, are there just to help you laugh.
No comments:
Post a Comment