The title makes you want to read this doesn't it? Engaging to the core and I'm sure it's not making you scrunch your nose in angst at all.
If you know me personally, you probably know I'm not exactly a quiet little mouse who has the patience of Mother Theresa. In fact, if you know me personally, you probably know that patience is not usually a word in my vocabulary.
Usually when an idea pops into my head it needs to be attended to immediately. Now, some could call that OCD or Type A. Those are fine terms. Personally, I like to think I just know what I want, when I want it, and usually I want it right now like that little brat from Willy Wonka.
But I digress.
I talked about suffering and I never really looked at it like this but having to be in situations you don't like is also suffering. Pleasure and Displeasure
I had to do something today that I realllllly didn't like doing. I'm a super hard worker. It comes with that whole OCD Type A thing I talked about above. I go above and beyond constantly. I am always looking for ways to better myself and my team. And yet, I never ask for anything to make that worthwhile. Remember that book "Lean In" that's become real popular lately? It's the same concept. Women tend to think they are just lucky to have a job. Women tend to think what are the consequences that will happen to me if I ask for what I'm worth. Women don't want to make waves. It took me a long time to realize that we HAVE to make waves. I've been getting under paid for a very long time now. When I joined my company, it was my first real life job. I took what was given to me because coming from college I was RICH. When I moved to my second role here, I got such a significant increase it would have been silly for me to fight for more. I didn't have to negotiate. And then my next role, when I tried to negotiate I was asked whether or not I was in it for the opportunity or for the money. Which, for the record, is a SHITTY thing for an HR person (or any person for that matter) to say. Especially when you have an exemplary employee you are trying to retain. (By the way, did I mention I have an MBA in HR and this is STILL hard for me?)
For future reference, the correct response to that asshole question is NOT to run to your mom in panic and cry and then say I just have to take what they gave me because I'm just lucky to have a job. The correct response because THEY are lucky to have YOU is "That is an absolutely unfair question and you are comparing apples to oranges. I am an extremely dedicated, coachable, and loyal employee who will do nothing but continue to go above and beyond for you if you choose to give me this opportunity. With that being said, my expectation for all of the benefits you will reap from having me as an amazing employee is to be compensated appropriately for what I will be giving to you."
Unfortunately, I learned that later rather than sooner. When I took my latest job I was still in the mode of taking advice about not negotiating and still thinking I was just lucky to have a job. Part of that is I don't think anyone is comfortable with tooting their own horn. It's a fine line between explaining how amazing you are and getting what you deserve and having people think you're a conceited asshole.
And I'm still severly under paid because I just am not good at telling people my value.
However today, I gathered my courage, I gathered all the emails from people saying how amazing I am, I typed up my speech to my boss and I walked into her office and asked for a raise. How it will turn out is up in the air yet, but I'm glad I did it. Because I've finally decided that I'm worth it. I talked to my friend Angie this weekend about this and she said something amazing that I'm keeping in my back pocket for if the answer comes back with a no. I fight HARD for this company and and now I'm going to fight HARD for me and what I deserve. And I expect that in turn, my company will fight hard to recognize my worth.
So, the lesson for today is FIGHT. Don't think you are lucky just to have a job. Your company is lucky to have you and you deserve to be recognized. But that's on you...and no one else. It's on you to make it happen.
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